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Apr 2013
How many more times do i have to repeat this pointless exercise of crying my eyes red and swollen due to a broken heart torn apart by grieve and regret.
How many times am i gonna dress in agony and despair and wait for the day to end. I'm glad when night falls. sleeping brings relief perceived. keep telling yourself this ****. The universe no longer listens to my repetitive crap of pain and lost glory days. I am 27 and long for my youth. How pathetic can someone be. Wallowing in self pity on the net for all to read. Is this my scream for help? this is the wrong platform don't I think.
How many times have i told myself the lie. I almost believe it. Just almost. Reality always brings me right back. Being in my twenties. I am plagued by indecision  fear and not knowing what to do. Feeling pressured 100% of the time. Finding no rest for a weary soul screaming for mercy. No, not love just mercy. You heard right. I will settle for the lesser and easier of the two. My God why have you forsaken me? I have asked this Q so many times. Still unanswered. I keep telling myself just make it to the next day time will heal my wounds and time will teach me how to beat my chest correctly without letting depression drag me down into the mud. Just make it to tomorrow. Be honest how many times have I thought about suicide only thing that stops me is what if i fail and i am left with a broken body. Lets be honest cutting sound real good now.
Written by
karin naude  riversdale
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