Nov 2019
There aren't many days
in which your presence
couldn't improve the quality
but some days
I can feel your absence
As we sit around the dinner table
and talk about our days
I yearn to hear how yours was
While we smoke by the fire
it feels as though
we are missing something
There are moments
that are so deafeningly silent
that they scream your name
It's as though we still expect
to hear your voice
fill in the pauses in conversation
It is always the little moments
the casual gatherings
beer in hand
those are the moments
that you live for
and taught me to appreciate
in which your presence
couldn't improve the quality
but some days
I can feel your absence
As we sit around the dinner table
and talk about our days
I yearn to hear how yours was
While we smoke by the fire
it feels as though
we are missing something
There are moments
that are so deafeningly silent
that they scream your name
It's as though we still expect
to hear your voice
fill in the pauses in conversation
It is always the little moments
the casual gatherings
beer in hand
those are the moments
that you live for
and taught me to appreciate
There are moments when I miss you intensely, when I wish you could be a part of everything going on. I love everything that you add to a group, and our house isn't the same without it. But I don't miss you because I feel like I need you, which is honestly the most healthy thing I have ever felt. In the past I hated being far from the person I was dating and I would wake up and go to sleep every day wishing I was with them and feeling incomplete without them. With you, I would absolutely choose together over apart because I enjoy you but I don't need you. I am loving where we are, having the distance and learning how to take care of myself is crucial now. I like my routine and time alone and it has been a long time since I have had that. And then I can be really excited when I get to spend a few days with you every couple weeks.
