Schizophrenic culture
say one do two, say two do one
never mind the midday sun, we have sun cream
we love our dogs but think nothing wrong trading with dog eaters
we believe in freedom, liberty for all look on as we trade with Saudis
Valentines, Romance tops, we have highest divorce rate in Europe so
we hate, moan, complain but we are great givers to Charities always
we have best Police Forces but we also have the best robbers in towns
we are clever, analytical and innovative but yet goat-herders sneak in
beating all our modern Coastal Defenses as they do our Welfare Dept
Ours is the Mother of Democracy as ours is as Machiavellian as it gets
we have Champagne Socialists and  other loonies who latch on to us
we like to play mind games but we do not consider that others do too
we are jingoistic and insular, conceited and self-centered yet morose
we invented Football, only won the World Cup once and never again
we have  best  Army but individually we are slimy cowardly bullies
we have the best Class system because we fool the workers with false
power
they haven't cotton on, as expected they're too busy posturing and
fighting amongst themselves
We make sure their leaders are from the Ruling Classes to check them
And if anything goes wrong we know we can always blame the Royals
Down with the Monarchy...yeah, yeah, yeah
by the way, we gave the world the Beatles
and don't you dare think
we're all bugs who thinks
we are the bees-knees