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Sep 12
I still don't know how it's

Or if it's possible...

Or if it
Happened exactly
How I remember

But I will
Do my best
To do justice

To the most sacred
Experience of my life
Thus far,

It all started with
A song I'd never heard before
"Long Lost Child"

I remember those words
Leaving my lips and feeling
A sense of shock

I had just told my wife
"Something strange is about to
Happen and I need you..."

The voice was mine but
The words all surprised me
"To trust me"


It had been a strange year
Equal parts beautiful
And tragic

I had been
Diagnosed a plural
Something I never even

Before but
Here We were

Dissociative Identity Disorder
Had haunted me my
Whole **** life

But finally I was
Getting words for
My experience

I was meeting new parts of me
Really old parts of me,
Frozen in time

Or in times
It's complicated
As you might imagine

On this night
I told my wife

To play a song
I was unfamiliar with
And told her to prepare

To hold me
To comfort
To be with me

Cause this was going to
Hurt like hell

It did
We played the

Over and over
And I sobbed
I was so scared

I wasn't ready
Yet to forgive

I wasn't ready
Yet to forgive

And I definitely
Wasn't ready to


So I called Her
A Her
And let go of Him

But after that day
I wasn't an atheist
Any more
Written by
Evangeline Ruth Hope  Transfeminine/South Lake, Utah
(Transfeminine/South Lake, Utah)   
   Shiv Pratap Pal
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