Is it real or is it fake, whatever it is, it's a mistake. Am I still living or am I just barely alive. Everything seems so fragile and dangerous like the edge of a knife.
Do I make the right decision or should I just submit to total submission. Do you value my words or will anyone else, what even is that question if I don't even do it myself.
There's nothing left to lose and the emptiness inside me is still growing, which might be a good thing, cause it makes it easier to choose. I could search for something or someone nice or just continue to live in this world of disguise. But I really feel like it doesn't matter, I just hope that it someday gets a little better.
Despite all this negativity around and within me, I know that life can be worth living and just as breathtaking as watching the sun sinking into the sea. Dealing with depressions and mood swings isn't easy and sometimes hard to explain, I just pray that my last bits of hope for change will still remain. I just want my feelings to be free and finally get rid of this aching agony.