I cried for you
like a little baby, and here I am at 5am writing a poem for you because I can't stop thinking about you and how you touched me in a such a profound way.
I'm not even angry anymore, and you deserve most of it, but it just seems so abrupt and cold this end.
I can see you online witg your posts, but you're not here. You have fundamentally vanished, decased, erased from my life, and I can't accept it.
There's too much invested, but you're gone,
And I'm gone too.
And you're heading off to some brilliant future with a newly kindled love in a city with potential, and I'm still here.
I can't just spontaneously love like you can or others can. I take ******* years.
I dont let anyone in. Noone knows me, not even my mother.
I will still be sitting here and I want to reach out.
I'm tired of the failures, and you leaving just amplifies my feeling of worthlessness.
I can't keep being alone, and a recluse. It is killing me,
I can't keep hiding, I can't keep dreaming,
I need to be free.

Free by any means