HORROR SCOPE

Turned the key
and the darkness exploded

into "SURPRISE!"
apparently I was

" a jolly good
fella!"

The room rocked....lit up!
It was all streamers and bunting.

******* I hate
my birthday...and parties.

My Mars was in retrograde
in my third house so

it was no
surprise.

My commitments, ideas and
short-distance travel...were shot!

All the planets
had turned up.

I was a Cancer but
with a Leo rising.

I had thought my moon
was in Venus but

there it was in the kitchen consoling
Pluto being thrown outta the Planet Club.

Uranus was being chatted up
by Kevin Bailey

discussing haiku
and tilt and ****.

Uranus was drunk as a skunk
rolling around the room on its side.

A Māori chap addressed
the sky-king-star as Whērangi

and it sobered up
its southern collar blushing.

My horror scope told me:
"There was a light and easy atmosphere

with today's planetary energy."
but I hadn't expected this.

"Ok you guys..party's over
everyone out...now!"

The planets reeled down the road
not in alignment...singing drunkenly.

"Jeez!" I said
in a Woody Allen voice.

"I hate my birthday.
And surprise parties!"