There is a time these feelings come back so intensely.
On other times...
they are a passing thought.
I don't blame it on the lack of care but...
I tried to want,
I tried to wait,
to be here...
the space given couldn't even accommodate the start of what I actually felt.

I am at a point where I let part(s) of myself go.
Those that I outgrow and don't work for me no more.
It is black, white, grey, blue...
many are colors of hope,
some are those of pain.

I know...
A woman's gotta live,
and when she is drowning,
she has to fight here way up and allow herself to breath again.

She then finds a safe home within herself before looking for it in other people and places.