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Jul 2019
The seething disturbance
The heart shaking kind
Has eased on my fragile soul
And plague inflicted mind

You know the reason why?
Time doesn't want to talk,
Yet god's rays cometh back come spring
Just because amongst the living you walk

Your heart is still under siege
How much longer can those walls hold?
You must know the road alone is long
How many more will you break as you grow old?

All those who approach your throne
Could never hope to realise
What that beautiful, stupid mind thinks
Behind those beautiful, empire felling eyes

None of this is your fault, nobody should
Cry because of something one can't control
Sending you down a spiral, you never thought
Would go beyond even the deepest hole

I could never hate you, although I want to
Everyone is the hero of their own story
Nobody can blame another for seeing differently
I've learned a lot, even the thing I needed, humility

Perfect and broken, unfortunate
Qualities that attract more war
Even I couldn't resist the battle call, sadly
You can't hope to see beyond my selfish bore

Maybe through this loyalty to yourself
That your candle is still lit
Even if a life as hectic as the ocean
Is striving to extinguish it

But a calm body of water, the frequency
Of that all healing, riveting smile
Perhaps a piece of my demise
Sure enough, gave you another mile

Cannot tell you how sorry I am for all this
If you want to, keep this in your memory
Know that I felt some minute solace,
Thinking at least for now you are "happy"
I was originally planning to send her this as a final goodbye, but now I know it is simply not worth it
Kornél Paróczai
Written by
Kornél Paróczai  19/M/Hungary
(19/M/Hungary)   
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