I look for family in everyone--- My blood banked me in brick buildings And grumbled when I didn't smile. My childhood was only legos,
Plastic strewn across the floor That I step on if I dont watch when I'm going. I'm growing, I grew up. No milestones but the ones I set And ones I'm told I passed 5 miles ago.
My home is a roof over my head Without walls, without windows, without doors. It is nothing more than a place to be, Like any other place, and it is not my home, Nor is any other place. I do not have a home, I make my own. In churches, in hearts, in moments
But not in a person, not in a bed, to call mine. I plan to burn all my bridges eventually I learned to swim. Breaking knees, I break my knees And I patch myself up with bandaid.
Every community a mourning Of a family that might have been Of a childhood that should have been Of a person that would not have been. A mourning rich with regrets that aren't mine to have.
I pretend the past doesn't exist And sometimes I make-believe the future doesn't, either I pick through the shame For something worth keeping.
My only family is my tea When I am gone, it will cool and settle And someday it will join the rivers And pass through the gills of a million fish Returning to their hatching bed to spawn And finding dam after dam.