Jennifer didn't get enough sleep last night. She was up until 3 AM writing a book report. She just finished her fourth cup of coffee with cream and extra sugar. She's starting to get the shakes.
Bobby fidgets nervously in an unnaturally comfortable seat in the waiting room of Dr. Stein's office. He got drunk last weekend and decided it would be a good idea to have *** with a girl who's known among as friends as "The Town Bus." She's a rather large girl whom almost everyone Bobby knows has had a go with. Bobby does his best to resist the urge to relieve the itch centered around his nether regions that introduced itself two days ago. He resists the urge successfully and continues to squirm in his seat. He's starting to get the shakes.
Ian looks down at the empty black garbage bag on the floor in front of him. He turns his head to his right and peers into his shadow-ridden closet. He thinks about the girl he met at the park last night. Her name was Mallory and she had such beautiful brown hair and blue eyes. Ian picks up the empty garbage bag and pushes back rows and rows of other bags, hanging neatly and silently in his closet. They're all filled, so Ian has to muster all of his strength to push them to the end of the rack pole. He mounts the empty garbage bag onto a hanger and hangs it next to the rest. Mallory, sweet Mallory wafts into his thoughts again. Ian runs his hand down the smooth black plastic, hanging solemnly, and empty, before him. It tells him it's disappointed. It tells him it's hungry. Ian hasn't killed anyone in three weeks. He purses his lips and looks down at his hands. He's starting to get the shakes.
I'm kind of a ******... Therefore, here's some more weird prose.