My therapist blinks
Once
         Twice
“But you know that’s no good”

I stare thoughtfully
“Yes”

“Yes what?”

Yes, I know how many calories it takes to keep from fainting,
To keep the growling at bay
To stop the cramping
But that doesn’t stop my body from revolting every time I take a bite
It doesn’t keep the calculator from running
It doesn’t make unsafe foods seem safe


Because nothing stops the pain like physical pain. And up until this point nothing has ever felt quite as good as hunger.


“Yes I know I can’t skip breakfast and lunch”

But my bones know the truth.