Misery loves company,
but not mine.
It prefers the remote,
until it needs a distraction.
Craving the wrong things at the wrong time,
but how would I know -
my watch battery's been dead for two years.
It's for aesthetics,
wardrobe enhancement -
that hasn't been updated in four years.
I still haven't unwrapped my calendar,
but I can tell by the holes,
the loose strings,
unsightly armpit stains.
Seems inevitable,
overzealous sweat glands.
Botulinum toxin might remedy,
but leave a syringe for the black box -
she could use a three to six month break.