Most days I smile,
most days I  rule the world.
most days I let people see me shine
most days I conquer sadness
most days I am a dreamer.
most days I let my mind set sail on my wildest requests.


But not today;
see today I am in a bed of tears,
drowning helplessly in my sorrows.
Today I let the world see my dull eyes and worn down smile.
No see,today I lost to my sadness and it conquered me,
defeated me, today I feel like my heart is six feet under.
Today I dream of better days,
I dream the dark clouds could vanish with a wave of a hand.
Today I dream I didn't hate myself so much.
Today, my mind has gone on a quest to find happiness,true happiness.
Though today its hard, its hard to collect my thoughts when they've only been scattered like breadcrumbs.
Today love feels undeserving.


Maybe my tomorrow will be promising,
or maybe not.
Maybe i'll continue drowning,
losing myself and others around me.