I long to be with others
To feel the comfort of a warm body
Sitting next to me
Lying next to me

When I am alone
I feel left out
Unwanted
Foresaken
Forgotten

Sitting in my tiny room
For hours on end
With nothing
But the light from the screen
The warmth of the monitor
To keep me company

But then when I am invited
To a movie
Or a game of basketball
My heart pulls me back
To the quietness of my room
The serenity that it bears

I long for kinship
To be included
But I also long for solidarity
For the warmth of my bed
A moment alone with my thoughts

For one who is so desperate
To find a place in this world
In this school and this life
Why do I resort to loneliness
And find comfort in it

Maybe I only favor loneliness
When it is a choice
Instead of a chasm
I have been thrown into
And can not escape

What am I?
Loner or Alone