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Jan 2019
Where I’m From

She’s from that town in Iowa that’s not too big and not too small.

She goes to that school where you have to fend for yourself and try not to get in people’s way.

She’s from that broken path that people made.

She’s that girl who sits in the back of the room silent like a mouse because she’s scared to say anything.

She writes to feel okay and get to lost for awhile.

She dances through the pain.

She is sleep deprived.

No sleep will cure how tired she is.

That path she’s on, she fights every day and keeps a smile on her face so no one stops and asks if she’s okay.

It’s hard to trust and call her best friend her best friend.

She keeps a lot to herself.

Like that fact she has scars on her hips when she was drowning in cold water.

Or that she’s scared to do what she loves the most...

She’s scared to open up and be herself.

She’s from that family who has to get grades and doesn't have a lot of money.

She doesn't fit in because she doesn't own the “store named” clothing.

She’s that girl who walks with her head down in the hallway and headphones in. She hears everyone talking through the music and she doesn’t like the things they say.  

The music she listens to is depressing. You’d call her insane if you listened to it.

Have you ever looked into her tired eyes and realize

she’s barely holding on anymore?

She stays up at night and tries to sleep.

But her demons don’t let her.

She always has those questions in her mind like, “is it worth it” “does anyone care”

But, someone cares

Her best friend.

He helped her get out of that cold water she was drowning in.

She finally put on a real smile and has a real laugh again. All because she knows every day when she gets up someone is caring for her and loves her.

Look into her not so tired eyes.

Notice anything? Notice she’s happy again? Or do not notice any change?

You didn’t notice any change because you haven’t been through

hell like her

It’s because she kept fighting and not caring. She found her person

That girl is me and I’m still here letting people know they can do it and that it’s worth the fight.

-Gillian Askeland
Gillian Askeland
Written by
Gillian Askeland  17/F/Everywhere
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