Anxious she finds herself Though lately less so Childhood bed In her childhood home Thinking childish thoughts in her childhood head Russian nesting doll
Nesting Nesting soon to be though not so Rings and nausea And please let me sleep Head in her mother’s lap
Mental illness and lack of routine Tapping on her glass
The blurry light from the hallway outside the bedroom reflecting on the shiny wooden headboard. How many many many times has this dappled wood revealed its imperfections in that blurry reflected light? Put me to sleep with your consistency and resolve
Thank you little light And mother’s hands that flipped the switch And eyes that remember And mini terrors of her adolescents that gave this reflection the right to sweep across her consciousness in swooning waves that feel soothing as they scrape.
In this moment its comfort is quite enough
Trying to fall asleep over the holidays and the blurry reflection of the light on the headboard that I didn’t know was so familiar to me