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Dec 2018
I've been surging with...
                        N E U R O T I C  E N E R G Y
                  
                                                                ­        All day
                                                             ­           at work.

I had to
         try and
               keep it
                     under control.

Control...                                    Control..­
o                                                   o
n                                                   n
t                                                    t
r       ­                                             r
o                 ­                                  o
l                                                    l
.       ­                                             .
.                 ­                                   .
.                                                    .

It's her. It's her.
Come on... Summon it.

I can still
              S E E  H E R
            e             e
          e                   r

E        V        E        R        Y        W       H        E        R        E

S h e ' s
                    a l l
                                    a r o u n d
                                                                ­ m e . . .

Dark, neurotic,
          blackened,                                   ­             - crimson goes here -
                  jet aura

I am
  Terriblyyyyyyyyyy                                       They spent
                                   y                                      more time
                                     y                                    with her
                                         y
                                              y
               ­                                  y
                                      s   s s
                               s
                            s
Jealoussssssssss

I should have come...
Right..?

We argued.
         Arrows shot everywhere.
              It felt good to
                    trade blows
                         with her.

I was                                           (haha!)
     so ****
        angryyyyyyyyyyy

                                  I­ must say, she
                                      takes a lot -
                                  Resilience? Nah...
                                      EMPATHY.

WHAT AN ACCURSED WORD.
EMPATHY. EMPATHY. EMPATHY.
HOW I SEEK YOU!
EMPATHY. EMPATHY. EMPATHY.
                                       .
                D I S C O R D.
                                  e  
                        ­      e
                          e
                      e
            ­    e
            l
b

Sometimes
I
Am
Just
So
Mad
At
You.

Sometimes
I
Am
Just
So
In love
With
You.
                                                  ­                               I am not
                                                             ­                    special to
                                                              ­                   you.

                                     Queen of the Nine!

Every time the healer healed me
I think I wanted to hurt again.

When she touched me yesterday...
I...
   It was...
        I just...
           I was...
              I really...
                 I craved it more.

It is unwise to persue her.
Distance yourself, warrior.
You must protect the..
             FRAGILE
               GLASS
                VASE
                   IN
                 YOU.

It is in pieces.
You are in pieces.
Look at what you cannot have.

                                      ... I shouldn't have become
                                          vulnerable to you
                                          that very night ...
(Written a day ago in a journal I have) Regarding frustration, guilt, intense anger and also regret. Plus, jealousy. Overall? A bad time. Many conflicting feelings. A long talk is due with an unrelated friend. I must exorcise the negative energy. I will also invest my empathy in others now.
Deadwood Jawn
Written by
Deadwood Jawn  21/M/The Unconscious
(21/M/The Unconscious)   
2.8k
       Deadwood Jawn, mia, --- and Try
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