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Nov 2018
It’s a cold wind
Blowing through my sweater
Through my t-shirt
Through my skin
To the bone

It’s a wet cold
The kind you can’t shake off
The kind you think
Will never go away
My teeth would chatter
If it was a real cold
But it’s mental

It’s a pulsing pain
Like a bad bruise
Like a torn muscle
Like how your legs feel
After leg day
At the gym

It’s a burn
Like touching a hot stove
Like running through flames
To save someone
Who was never there
So now you’re on fire
For no reason

It’s a heart attack
But slow
A violent attack
On everything in your heart
On who you love
On what you believe
And you want to die
To stop it

It’s a punch to the face
Breaking teeth
And busting your lip
Now you’re gushing blood
You want to swing back
But you’re the only one there
You fight back the tears
So you won’t look weak
But you’re the only one there

It’s ******
Because you can’t get enough
You know it’s bad
You know it hurts
You know it changes you
And people see it
And it scares them away
But you keep going back

Because you’re addicted.
It's been a rough week
Sam Kauffmann
Written by
Sam Kauffmann  22/M/Massachusetts
(22/M/Massachusetts)   
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