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Nov 2018
They say that
I'm one of a kind.
You can only find
One of me.
This body, it
Thinks on its own.
This mind, it
Works alone.

Nothing makes sense anymore.
Living off dollars and cents,
These streets don't have
Much to offer.
If you're a copper,
It's my time to flee.
Why can't you leave me?
It's already hard to just be.
Difficult to live,
Move and breathe.
I feel like I'm drowning.

Voluntary Apnea:
The choice to not breathe.
A lack of oxygen
To the brain that
Causes a sensation
Of darkness
Closing in
From all sides.

They say that they’re
Here for the ride.
They don’t realize that
My pride is
At stake.
This smile
This laugh
This glimpse of hope.
It’s all fake.
I’m barely holding on
This rope,
Getting tighter by the minute.
In this world,
I don’t fit.
I gotta admit,
This life, it ain’t for me.
It’s so hard to commit.
It hurts so hard to just be.

I feel like
I’m wasting time.
My past,
Full of crimes.
Gotta climb
These mountains,
More losses than wins.
It’s so hard to just exist.
It’s not like I’ll be missed.
I’ll just be dismissed.

They say that
Silence is hard to come by.
So are good friends.
Because no message is
Still a message.
Relationships are a blessing,
But noise is a curse.
Life *****, but
I’m worse.
Let’s not deny the facts,
I watch your reacts,
The way that you see me,
But don’t acknowledge it.
It’s like you see the Holy Ghost,
But don’t wanna submit.
They say to defy the odds,
Prove the demons wrong,
Stick with the squads.
But I don’t belong.

You tell me that
I'm not lonely.
Feel free to show me.
Life's a show,
I go toe-to-toe with
This utopian reality;
Fatal vitality.
Why's everything gone bad?
Why am I going mad?
Show me what's right;
Show me the light.
that feeling of wanting to be left alone, but having the fear of being alone
Andrew Choo
Written by
Andrew Choo  20/M/Toronto, ON, Canada
(20/M/Toronto, ON, Canada)   
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