i lament the humidity
of the air and the harsh
midday sun
i can feel my sweat
sticking on my skin
even if i just finished
another bath
what do the remaining
hours of this day hold?
nothing seems to make
me anticipate new mornings
anymore
i fall asleep easier now
maybe because i'm
always tired
is this day 10 or 100
or 1000
of being confined
in an endless cycle of
troughs and crests
i can no longer remember
the last time i was able
to sustain a sense of
contentment
i think it was when we were
leaving the port of Cebu
i had my very first cigarette
we were saying goodbye to
the fading city lights
the cold water crashing on
the sides of the ship is
enticing me to
jump off