I could have been more careful than I was.
I didn’t have to love you,
Or let my heart be broken,
Enough to let you in there,
Suffocating me, lifeless,
But beating for you so that you could breathe.

I could have been more selfish than I was.
I didn’t have to love you,
Or break pieces off of me,
Breaking them off one by one,
Till I was a shell, shattered,
But able to put you back together.

I could have been more angry than I was.
I didn’t have to love you,
Or hold you so innocent,
As innocent as a child,
Withholding judgment, calmly,
But letting you turn fury back on me.

I could have been more knowing than I was.
I didn’t have to love you,
Or confront my need to give,
Giving so you would love me,
Till I left my tank, empty,
But looking back I learned what I should be.