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Oct 2018
You can leave the life
But the life wont leave you
Its talons are hooked into your chest
You’re reminded of the pain
Every-time you breathe
And i know it hurts
Youre scared.
That life you left behind
That you clawed your way out of
You dont want to fall back in
I tell you that you never talk to me
But the more i sit here and think
The more i realize that you did
But my ears were closed
Only wanting to open if you were blunt
But thats not you and ive been so deaf
Your wounds were never hidden
Your scars never covered up
I see it now
How can i not?
Im quick to jump
and quick to push away
And i never once thought to just keep my feet on the ground
To just hold tight to what ive had
In a perfect world i’d have thought
In a perfect world you wouldnt know the pain
That comes with an empty stomach.
And you wouldnt be craving the thing thats going to destroy us
But im your rock.
Your reason for living
And i meant it when i said i shouldnt be
I shouldnt be
Im on my own downward spiral
What if i cant hold us both up?
Were going through our own same ****
Breaking our bones to try
And fit in the boxes we made for each other.
Everything i said was the truth
My love for you is unlike any other
Im breaking my bones with a smile on my face
And tears in my eyes
We have to break to get stronger
To be better
And when i look up at you
I see the universe in your eyes
And i feel it deep in my soul
It surrounds us
Swirling around our bodies
Like nicotine smoke
when the sun is sleeping
I feel the pain in your marrow
I see it dripping out onto the floor
Nose bleeding and hands shaking
Ive been so focused on me
Me me me
Always me
Never you
And we have the same problem
Do you see it too
We cant escape
Promising to not hit each other
But look at us now
Bruises decorate our bodies
When i told you i liked it rough
I didn’t mean emotionally
And look at me now
Making it about me again
Maybe i wasnt there when they gave the lesson on how not to be a narcissist.
How not to be selfish
How to ******* open my ears and rip open my eyes
Its taken me such a long time to see your struggles and now that ive seen them
Im scared to leave you
Not walk away from you, from us
But the road im on has me walking towards death himself
And time and unforeseen occurrences befall us all
Ecclesiastes 9:11
If i died tomorrow how would you live?
I worry about that
Im not immortal
and im not going to make it into paradise
I hope you find peace within yourself
I hope you find comfort in my arms while it lasts
I told you last night to look at where you are now
No longer in the hood
No longer in the game
No longer with that pain
Look how far you come
You’re not alone anymore
You have us.
And were not going anywhere
I need you to remember that
When the pain comes back to haunt you
When i get mad and walk out of the room
When the memories flash across your eyes
Remember that.
Put your faith in my promises that i made you in the kitchen
Put your faith in those lyrics that you relate too so much
And when the day comes that my heart is no longer beating
Put your faith in my undying love and stay strong
Don’t fall back into that life you left
Don’t be scared.
I meant it when i said i’d never leave you.
Not even in death.
Luna D
Written by
Luna D  23/F/houston, tx
(23/F/houston, tx)   
176
 
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