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Oct 2018
Hating you both would be easier than acting like I just don’t care.
I don’t think breaking down would change your mind, even if I cried until tears drowned us, and you would still look at me in disgust.
It’s all I want to do though.

Hearing her name reminds me how little I am compared to her, how much more she glows.
I don’t have humour like she always has.
I’m not as tall or as appealing.
I am just an embodiment of discontent, never happy with less than a victory.
I will be in your way, until I can’t see the beauty in your eyes.

I should hate you for more reasons, for being my ruin and yet never having to look god in the eye for what you did.
I cannot. I never could.

I don’t even want to kiss you.
I just want your body holding mine.
I just want your body holding mine.
I don’t even want to kiss you.
I just want your body holding mine.

If I was allowed to scream, I would.

But I made no promises.
Rose Brown
Written by
Rose Brown  18/F/England
(18/F/England)   
105
   JaxSpade
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