Tell em:
You look too funny with yer hair like that
You look like a Fabio-woman; isn’t it grand?
You look like a hippie with your finger in yer crack
You look like my aunt with a whistle in her stack.

Tell em:
Your hair looks like I could hang you from a porch
And if you turned right around, I thought you me sister
Go sit on a piano to be painted like a girl
You look so cheesy I just might hurl.

Tell em:
You might've run away from a pair of scissors
You tryin' to be a princess or something?
You give me a fright when we look your way
Cause you might as well dance in drag today.

I'LL TELL EM:
I don't care whether I got distance on my head
You never did anything to stand out on your own.
So let me be just being so high in the sky
Being a long-haired ****** 'til the day I die.