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Aug 2018
You question my devotion?
I am the person you have hurt the most--other than yourself of course
You have hurt me--physically and mentally
As a kid, I did not understand why I protected you
As an adult, I see that it is because I loved you
Person among person have tried to turn me against you
Even you
But I never caved, I am not caving, and I never will
so goes the cycle

Because Of Alcohol. . .
. . . I lost my mother
. . . I lost my father
. . . I lost my childhood
. . . I was abused
. . . I was *****

I do drink when I am home and around comfortable friends I trust
I don't drink . . . Because Of Alcohol

Because Of Alcohol
. . . I have anger issues
. . . I have trust issues
. . . I have relationship issues
. . . I see *** as a power play, not an act of love

I miss you
You are my favorite person . . . when you are sober
I know you will do anything and everything you can to protect me . . . when you are sober

You are an adult so you can make your own choice
When I was 11 I learned you will always choose alcohol over me
Something my baby brother wouldn't learn until he turned 18

I wish you would stop
I lay awake at night wondering if today you will wake up in the hospital
or if you will wake up at all
I wish you would stop

You are still so young
you can not do it by yourself
I wish you would stop
Stop the lies of, "well I'm drinking less"
"well I'm trying"
If you were trying you would be at AA right now
but you are not
you will never get your drinking "under control"
you need to stop
. . . for your daughter
. . . for your son
. . . for your future grandchildren
but first and foremost for yourself

Because You Are Worth It
MadBunnyScientist
Written by
MadBunnyScientist  27/F/Utah
(27/F/Utah)   
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