Hi! My name is --
       Armpit fat hanging out from the strangulation of my push up bra,
       Unlovely love handles poorly clothed by leggings waistband,
       A zebra-striped, stretch-marked ***,
       Shoulder-length, untamed mane resting on weightlifter traps,
       Snub nose on a face as circular and flat as a waiter’s tray,
       Except for the hilly scar on the tip of my snout,
       Eye bags of a zombie risen from the bed,
       Juicy, voluminous, red Skittle zits,
       Accompanied by a mole like Marilyn’s
       (But this one ain’t so ****),
       Four foot eleven and a half plus high heel calluses,
-- Katie for short.
But despite what I’m called,
Maybe we can get to know each other
A little better?