I want to eat a tub of ice cream,
Make folks wonder where it went;
And gorge on so much junk
I look just like the president!
I want to slam three layer cakes
Like they were made of air,
And I get so stinking big
You can see me everywhere!

Eat, eat, eat until I'm perfectly round;
Why bother walking when I can roll all around?
Munch, munch, munch all day and all night;
I'm going to be huge so there’s no need to fight.
Chomp, chomp, chomp, chew a pizza or two;
And a couple bags of chocolate chip cookies too!
Triple cheese burger large fries and drink;
Go get as full as a tick, don’t bother to think.

You might as well accept it
I want what I want all of the time
And if I don’t get my way
I consider that a personal crime.
All you can eat joints feel like my own home;
When I get done I'll be shaped like a dome!
Buffalo wings for happy hour, maybe twenty
And beer by the pitcher, I can drink plenty.

Eat, eat, eat until I'm perfectly round;
Why bother walking when I can roll all around?
Munch, munch, munch all day and all night;
I'm going to be huge so there’s no need to fight.
Chomp, chomp, chomp, chew a pizza or two;
And a couple bags of chocolate chip cookies too!
Triple cheese burger large fries and drink;
Go get as full as a tick, don’t bother to think.

Don’t bother to lecture me on my gastronomy
Sure, people are starving way far away.
I am helping here at home with our economy
And I'm doing it every day.
Talking about starvation makes me want to
Eat more than ever I did yeseterday, besides,
So that kind of argument is just wasted on me
Since I don’t find it all that wise!