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May 2018
I will not waste time counting losses
They only bring me down
If I allow my brain to think
In my thoughts I'll surely drown

I have built a bridge over memories
To escape rapid flow
A rail so I don't tumble
Into dangerous swells below

As long as I remain detached
Distant from usual pain
I am able to harness meager cheer
Keep myself from going insane

I feel a strengthening in my blood
A wanting no longer there
I have laid away former distractions
In favor of clean vacant air

I have done away with disorder
At least the negative kind
I am going to forget my bad habits
Regain the lost parts of my mind

No more whining or self-deprecation
Or wanting to change who I will be
I am tossing out the mocking past
Finally embracing beautiful me
Written 1/13/12

Reading this now if course brings thoughts of recovery and addictiin to my mind but this was waaaay before I ever did real drugs.  It was written about my insecurities and accepting myself for the imperfect mess I am.
Written by
Amanda  25/F/Alaska
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