May 2018
Forgive me mother,
for I have sinned.
Like most others,
I wish to make amends.
Forgive me mother.
Search your heart.
You are my maker.
How great thou art.
When I try to say what matters,
and everything goes south,
the heat of the moment makes me stutter.
I lose control of my mouth.
When everything falls silent,
and I realize what's been said,
I no longer can repent.
Instead I'm filled with dread.
When I try to say what matters,
and instead I'm overwhelmed,
I ignore the endless chatter.
I now just want to be held.
Once it's all said and done,
those words weigh heavy on my mind.
I feel empty and numb,
and simply wish I had been kind.
Forgive me mother,
for I have sinned.
Like most others,
I wish to make amends.
for I have sinned.
Like most others,
I wish to make amends.
Forgive me mother.
Search your heart.
You are my maker.
How great thou art.
When I try to say what matters,
and everything goes south,
the heat of the moment makes me stutter.
I lose control of my mouth.
When everything falls silent,
and I realize what's been said,
I no longer can repent.
Instead I'm filled with dread.
When I try to say what matters,
and instead I'm overwhelmed,
I ignore the endless chatter.
I now just want to be held.
Once it's all said and done,
those words weigh heavy on my mind.
I feel empty and numb,
and simply wish I had been kind.
Forgive me mother,
for I have sinned.
Like most others,
I wish to make amends.
I wrote this when I got into an argument with my mother and said something I didn't mean. I was angry. As this happens often with many people during a dispute, I found myself having a reason to write my feelings out and yet again share them with the world. It's never pretty when you say things you don't mean. You get in a heated argument, become overwhelmed, Eventually, you panic and need to say something. But your so filled with rage and tension that you spit out the worst choice of words possible.
