the weapons i use against myself
are ones that can’t be hidden
or taken away
it’s me
my hands
that i’ve turned against myself
the only things that make me think of pain
are long, sharp fingernails

even now i can’t scratch an itch
without my fingers digging into my skin
for the last two years
the only touches my stomach and sides
have felt
are soft strokes deciding a path
then sharp, sudden stings
so even after stopping for months
touches to my sides and stomach
make me flinch