I felt empty where ever I went there were not footsteps left behind I felt as if I didn't even exist and I didn't then... I was walking around soulless drowning in my sorrows, drowning in despair. life was as it was! A ghost had a better chance of living. I was alive but dead inside. The drugs made me feel. Sometimes I'd numb that out too I wished for a hangover since I could never get one. I would go clubbing and lose myself in the music I love dancing, but swinging left and right Id just stop find a corner and just pretend that I cared drowned me in some patron. I'd go to weddings with friends and during that cute moment ( slow dancing). I'd be smiling whiling crying on the inside ( truly was a beautiful moment). Im just too heartbroken.