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Oct 2012
Honestly,
I find it rather cruel to leave me lingering.
Lingering like unwanted taint from a long, hard day of work.


You should of just crushed me.
You should of told me there was no hope.
You should have told me that it all was just a fallacy.
You should have made me hate you.
Even then, after I would regroup my dignity after being such a fool,
I do not believe my heart would wish ****** harm against you.
How pathetic do I sound right about now?
All I pray for is to have a stronger heart,
A stronger mind.


Already, I grow tired of pining over you.
The one time I decided not to shut someone out
And in return, I am left with a much larger void.


I greatly dislike my understanding personality.
It is something that I never possessed,
But I did not expect to find someone similar to me.


I simply wished that I was burdened
By the ignorant naivety of today's youth.
I am finding it quite factual that I am deemed cursed.
That real love or an ideal relationship,
Has forsaken me.


I am aware of the obvious.
I am aware of my own youth.
I am one who survives on the care for others.
Only for ones I see fit.


Alas, here I am rambling on about the usual.
All I must say, is that my feelings were true.
Surprising, actually,
For I was only seeking company
And found something much more.


I find it a burden to know that
Someone as good as you, is out there.
I simply wish, I perhaps will count the days,
That one day, I can call you mine
And I, yours.


We all know that is just the latest crazy talk
That mind-fuckery builds when we
Are alone, yearning for the things we cannot have.


**** this hopeless romantic heart of mine.
**** being weak.
**** being vunerable.
**** being understanding.
Just, **** everything.


I leave you with:
You should of just crushed me.
You should of told me there was no hope.
You should have told me that it all was just a fallacy.
You should have made me hate you


Yet, knowing I,
I want to linger.
I wish that I will linger in your mind.

If not, I simply hope that peace with shroud every inch of you
And that you will find what your heart seeks.
Jessica Heagy
Written by
Jessica Heagy
1.2k
   Maria Sinoway
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