(2003)

this confusion is
crippling my mind
is
ever so slightly, breaking my heart
is
making me emotional and
making me want to cry
all the time
so I
grip unto my sanity
letting go of my security
so I
doubt my responseability
want to disown my accountability
and then
love her more than I can stand
miss her more than I can take
want to
never leave her
never wake alone
and
lavish upon her
love and care
but also
I dont want to leave my home
the friends I've know
my private sanctuary
my walled castle keep
I need to
see
I need to weep
for
my friends
my home
my love
my life
lost and forgotten
- maybe -
or just a new beginning,
and then
tomorrow and tomorrow,
and then
I'll know.