do you remember,
back in third or fourth grade,
when you first started feeling anxious?
when your breaths got ragged
and your eyes were twitching
after someone pretended to punch you
and they sent you home?

and do you remember when
you asked me if the world was all bad
and I couldn't answer?
I'm still sorry about that.

and do you remember those late nights
when dad didn't come home?
and how we stayed out of his way
when he did
but it was never far enough away?

do you remember getting out of there
at eighteen, wandering without me
because I was too selfish to leave? it's nobody's fault anymore, I guess.

do you remember me coming to your funeral? they say you died of an overdose
but you never did drugs.

can you see me or is dying just like dreaming? maybe if I find out I can be with you forever.
for now I'm just talking to your headstone again.

I hope you can see me from wherever you are.