i don’t know how to feel when i talk to you
obviously there isn’t a right or wrong
but sometimes i wish there was

it’s odd because
often times i’ll feel guilty when you show me any form of kindness
i worry you feel forced
i try to comfort myself and believe it’s irrational but

i always feel this slimy flame creep the length of my spine
it crawls from my spine to the base of my neck
it’s grip strengthens, the heat
it might be suffocating me
but in some poetic and artful manner

as i begin to burn
my hair has been set ablaze!
i contemplate the brevity of my existence
my eyes have become unbearably hot!
i ruminate on all of what was and what could have been
my entire body has become entangled with restless heat!

as the light fades
it is light that has overtaken me

in my fleeting moments
i realize that i am lucky
because to burn because of you,
is a pleasure