Your not feeling happy, but your smile turns genuine at the sight of him. Beauty in his laughter and smile. You know he's doing it for you so you echo it back for him. He needs some joy in midst pain. You want to be that joy.
But cracks surface and he takes it out on you. Lashes and lashes and lashes and gosd it hurts. Arguments hurt. Uncalled for words hurt. But the smile is fixed on your face. He doesn't want pain, he needs joy.
But he pushes you away, the same way you push away the ones you love to protect them from pain. He doesn't realise the pain intensifies when it's from him, or even though your powerless you want to take away that burden from his shoulders.
So you let it hit you, waves on waves, salt on open wounds waiting for the sting to cease.