I was so good for so long

I was good when I was 10
I was good when they would fight about the other woman
I was good when I pretended I didn't know the truth

I was good when I was 13
I was good when they were stressed from work
I was good when they said it was my fault
I was good when I believed it was my fault

I was good when I was 15
I wasn't top of my class
I couldn’t get the scholarship
they couldn't pay the bills
but I was good
I was good when I let it be my fault

I was good when I was 17
I was good when they fought about the other man
I was good because I was a punching bag
I was good because I didn’t scream
I was good because I didn’t tell anyone

I was good until I was 18

When I realized I didn't want to be good anymore
because the bruises on my body
and the scratches on my face
and the nights I spent drowning my screams in the overflowing tub
and the blood seeping through my pajama sleeves
and the empty prescription bottles
and the Christmas morning I woke up with a headache
because I didn't take enough pills to not wake up at all

were never going to be good enough.