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Nov 2017
The miracles of your being rest light in my chest
I'm much further along now. I understand why.
The reasons of our departure are justified, and they need rest easy.
It no longer surprises me, and I am not hurt.
You. You and your elegance, the little bit you had.
Calling me back to bed while your lips pressed the words you never spoke.

You built me up. The words you spoke stuck strong, stuck hard.
I could easily lose my mind wondering everything you ever thought.
If your hands were to ever speak they'd tell me to leave.
Not a single bone in your body wanted my company.
Soon enough, you'd give up. Soon enough I'd be gone away.
Soon enough you'd see what you had done to make this fail.

Nothing is as it had been.
I miss your voice like hell.

Been thinking about what went wrong. How everything changed.
And though it makes sense, I don't know what to make of this.
There was no point to our love, we acted off of impulse.
And though it makes sense, I don't want to believe it.

My choices led us to where we are now.
I did what I could to keep myself happy.
I tried. I'm trying.

Come on, love. Watch me fall to pieces.
I'll be where you envisioned I'd always land, deep below your feet.
And the remorse, if any, will **** you alive.
I can only imagine the lack of emotion you're carrying, just as always.
If you'd ever shed a tear, if you'd only let it go.
But now, don't let me be the reason you broke.


You tried, but not much.
You gave the bare minimum. And I believed it.
You let me think the substance was much thicker.
Your lies and deception were all too good to believe.
But now you're gone, and I'll let the memories of us fade.
Because if I don't,
I'll lay in your shadows for eternity.

It's cold on the floor, but my bed is where our memories lie to rest.
So watch me as I sleep in anyone else's bed but mine.
Watch me fill my need for affection with those who give none.
Watch the mindless beings I bring into my life take over my soul.
Watch my obsession of anything other than you, and us, and how we were before.

Nothing makes sense anymore, not that it ever did with you.
But now even less, even more-so of a reason to fall.
I realize the fault in my actions. But you never will.
And that's something I'll have to live with forever.
Rest easy, to something that once was.
Rest easy to everything I ever thought I was.
Caitie
Written by
Caitie  the states
(the states)   
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