What if I was the girl,
the girl who walks through life with ease.

What if I was the girl whose perfectly blonded hair
flew behind her,
just as her worries.

What if I was the girl whose stomach didn't budge
no matter how badly she wanted it.

What if I was the girl
whose skin was kissed so gently by the sun
that she couldn't dare being a blade to it.

What if I was the girl,
who people told that they love her.

What if I was the girl
who wore scrunchies up her wrist
not to hide the marks of a blade
but simply to push her hair out of her face.

What if I was the girl
who could stand to see
myself , bare, in the mirror.

What if I was the girl that people
not only wanted to love
but couldn't help but love.

What if I was the girl whose happiness came from
living her life,
not ending it.


But

I am not that girl.

So

I will be this girl.

So I will be this girl,
the girl who knows that her light will dim her darkness,
like the sun painting a blackened sky.

So I will be the girl
who knows that those men can't hurt me anymore.

So I will be this girl,
the girl who chooses to smile even though she has every reason to not.

So I will be this girl,
the girl who chooses not to run from her past
but to walk away from it .

So I will be this girl,
the girl who knows that her demons are merely written on her skin,
not a force to which she will give in.

So I will be this girl.