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Jul 2017
I brought you flowers and only smiled when you stomped on them.
Your eyes were swollen and red when you told me to leave with your mouth.
Then you stepped back and invited me in with your silence.
We sat at opposite ends of the couch.
I watched our favorite movie, you muffled your wimpers and tried to hide your tears as you stared at your phone.
I covered you with a blanket once you fell asleep.
I stayed up a little longer, lest your night terrors come.
Now it was my turn to weep; I kept quiet so you wouldn't wake up.
I fell asleep on the floor in front of you and you were gone when I woke up.
I could hear your sobs coming from the bathroom.
My hand grabbed yours as you emerged.
You didn't even try to hide your wrists as the blood ran down them.
Back in the bathroom we went.
I cleaned the wounds and wrapped bandages around them in silence.
You couldn't look me in the eye when you asked "Why?"
I held back tears as I looked up at you and smiled.
We went on a walk that day and didn't get back until dark; Silence the entire time.
Whenever I saw you glancing over at me, I made sure I was smiling.
When we got home, we could barely stand, leaning up against each other.
I drew you a hot bath and sat outside the tub, washing your hair for you.
I knew we didn't have much longer together and I knew you didn't want to talk about it, or anything for that matter.
The next morning, I made you breakfast in bed; you refused to eat.
The time was drawing close, I made a phone call.
Later that day we went to see our friends for a late lunch.
It was only an hour before we returned home.
I was tired and told you I needed a nap.
I could see the anguish in your eyes, but I only smiled and kissed you on the forehead.
I laid down in our bed and went to sleep.
I didn't wake up.
A couple days passed and a package arrived.
You opened it and found a jar of liquid and a note: "Remember, Olive Juice."
I can still see your smile from here.
Ethan Titus
Written by
Ethan Titus  30/M/Jersey Shore
(30/M/Jersey Shore)   
     winter sakuras, --- and ---
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