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Jun 2017
A childhood friend took a handful of narcos at 11:30 in the morning
When I ask her why she tells me she just wants to feel o.k
I don't ask her anymore questions
At 12:30 we both hop in an Uber
Her eyes flutter open and closed
"Don't fall asleep"
words struggle to slip out of her tightly clenched jaw
"But it feels g..."
Our driver looks at me through the rearview mirror
She doesnt finish her sentence until we arrive at our destination
I shove her arm hard
"Good" she says, and forgets to close the car door behind her
"What am I supposed to do if you pass out?"
"I wont"
"Yes, you will"
"I won't I promise, I'm very awake"
1:05 I see her slumped over in her chair while getting her nails done
I try to shake her awake
The nail lady glances up at me from over her glasses
"She's fine" I tell her, "I'll be right back"
I ran home and didn't come back
I ran because I didn't want to be questioned
I ran because I didn't want to be responsible
I ran because I'd rather leave her there than take her home knowing her parents would tell my parents
That was the day I realized I was selfish
Vivian g
Written by
Vivian g  19/F/California
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