I stood up for you and covered your *** too many times to count.

Sometimes I wonder why I did it
when you treated me so badly
in the end of it.
We had our good moments but that was when we were alone, when you shined a different way and after awhile that faded into the person (maybe you wanted it that way) everyone else saw you as:
selfish, mean, bigoted person.
And I wonder why I often allowed you into my life, and clung onto to you so strongly and why I let you ruin me/let me ruin a wonderful relationship until I finally gained the strength to let go of you and I remember:
I wanted to help you.
I wanted to heal you.
I wanted to love you,
in anyways a could (as a lover and then a friend)
but you wouldn't let me.

You are just like me.
I could not help you
because
I could not help myself.
Now I have, and I am
and I hope you can
do the same for yourself.
I no longer wish you hell,
I wish you well.
Have a nice life,
shining honey bear.
((even if you'll never see this))