For so long I've wondered how
Dreadful would it be
For me to forget how complicated
Things are between
You and my thoughts
At 12 am, caressing a cigarette.

Darling, you were the song to my music,
The dreaded prince to my long gone story
Of whatever happiness this world
Made me believe.

As I speak the words of longing,
My eyes wander to the stars,
Hoping you'd hear the hints of my
Bottled up emotions.

I am leaking.
Leaking with fear, self doubt.
I don't want to bleed
Bitter memories, ugly utterances of
How miserable it is
To love you.

I am spinning in one place,
Trying to stay, trying to heal
The cracks of my broken
Faith in you.

I love you, darling I do.
Even if I have bottled emotions that I'll never show you.