reruns of old shows just to distract me
providing some ease for my restless mind. my head aches, my eyes burn and sting and swell from the tears that spring up whenever I think of the past.
every second growing older, me and everyone around me.
Is it selfish to say, that I'd live the first ten years of my life until my dying day?
I just can't take people I love dying around me. I can't do it the thought itself kills me. It keeps me up at night.
I can't live this thing called life.