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Mar 2017
Wear green, anything green, green will save you
For certain - except on non-holy days maybe,
For those, a ****** is the best standby
Preferably one from an old religion
Thus establishing your undoubted innocence
And no matter it hampers the shenanigans
We are after all preventing lightning.

In the absence of a ******, some silk –
Yellow as the Sun and carried in the pocket
Out of sight as if it is a secret -
Damp it through with a drop of neat Poteen,
Drink some yourself to keep the airways clean
And never, but never, carry a stick
Unless it has a rubber ferrule on the end.

Ireland has a big sky so do look up.
Leather shoes are important - don’t wear synthetic -
And patterned socks are best turned inside out,
Though it must be said of this advisory
The ways of lightning are its own to know
And no amount of shoe and sock revising
Can guarantee your safety on an Irish road.

For the rest advices, I do not hold them to be true -
Tried and tested down the generations
My ancestors, and my family too,
Have always known that lightning prevention
Is its own reward, and habit forming.
Finally, there are leaflets available for free and
As you exit the aircraft please do feel
Ireland always takes your safety seriously.
Happy Paddy's Day
Tommy Randell
Written by
Tommy Randell  67/M/Whitby, N Yorks, UK
(67/M/Whitby, N Yorks, UK)   
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