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Feb 2017
At the edge of seventeen I can’t believe I made it this far.
Never saw this moment coming
Not out of fatality just momentum-based blindness
Rocketing into the realm of time at 460 meters per second
Can seem kind of damning
So the self-proffered lies in order to sleep? necessary.
“I’ll do it tomorrow”
Do you own tomorrow?
Have you seen it in existence?
“I’ve still got time.”
As if time is something one can purchase
Except it wasn’t ever ours
So we have to give it back
And like all borrowed things it has a time limit
Ironic
At the edge of seventeen I don’t know what mine is

Because
At the edge of Seventeen I am doing the splits
Stuck between two time periods of my life and one is still putting up a fight
Don’t let go
Stop changing
Caught between a rock and an avalanche, one is coming at me much harder, faster
At the edge of seventeen I’m working all the angles and learning the equations trying to equate my life to a formula
Except formulas are predictable
At the edge of seventeen I realized that life isn't as mean as I’d always act as if it was

and at the edge of seventeen I realize moments go by really quickly.
At the edge of seventeen I realize the edge is really high
At the edge of seventeen I have never been high
At the edge of seventeen the end of the earth starts blending with the sky
At the edge of seventeen the limits seem to disappear and reappear in new forms
Like a regenerate limb of a starfish my boundaries are reappearing
I feel sometimes like the universe spit me out like a rejected blood transplant I just never fused

At the edge of 17
I am arrogant
Never mortal
Watch me defy death every morning
I will rise
I talk about the rest of my life as if it has become a tangible thing for me
I consider my existence? prophecy
there are 7 billion 45 million people on this planet and I have the audacity to believe that my three existential crises all before breakfast are the most significant occurrence since the creation of time

At the edge of seventeen I am standing on the ledge with you
Laughing at the sky
At the edge of seventeen I am swimming with you in the lake
At the edge of seventeen chlorine has made me a green haired monster
At the edge of seventeen we have caught baby turtles and put them into the back seat
At the edge of seventeen I am flying down the highway with all the windows down
At the edge of seventeen you never let me go
At the edge of seventeen you never made me say goodbye
At the edge- you pushed me off

And I flew.
Carbon based life forms will approximately breathe 151372800 times in 18 years.
Klaryssa
Written by
Klaryssa
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