It started with a phone call
Sent my hands shaking
Like his did, laying on that hospital bed
Like my voice did, the next day when I lied
About the truth.
The Truth.
The truth is that I was terrified
I was confused, I was hurt,
I was furious
And He was there,
but he wasn't…
He was there on that hospital bed
He was there with his hands shaking
He was there, his body convulsing
He was there, his wild blue eyes darting about the elevator
he wasn't there at all…

It started with a phone call
Your mom is coming, you have to go.
It must be an appointment
i couldn't think of one…
Is someone dead?
well no, not really...
We're going to the hospital
The hospital? I thought that was only for babies and old people
OCD, what's that? Oh, I mean, "O.D.'ed"
Same difference?
not really, no…

The next day, I lied.
I couldn't tell the truth,
The truth was hiding
Behind hospital doors, and hands that shook.
Hushed voices carried the truth in tones too low to be heard.
The truth attacked me at night
In memories that sent me shaking
Shivering so violently my mom got scared.              
The truth was blue
The truth was screaming at me
From the blue eyes of my brother
When he looked at me, and asked what it was like.
Not that he looked at me,
not really…