it's hard to remember a time
when my bones didn't creak like rotting wood
at the mention of another girl.
jealousy wreaked havoc because
i couldn't trust.
its hard to picture a place
that wasn't shrouded in darkness
as his hand crept up my leg when
i didn't ask it to.
it's hard to replace the feelings of
distrust with trust,
lust with love,
and depression with pure joy.
i feel like i'm standing in the ocean
and with each tide that comes
there is another weight tied to me
until i drown- anxiety.
but when i am with you
it's easier.
easier to breathe
because when i am with you
i float in the water.
you carry those weights for me.
and all you had to do was
look at me and smile.