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Dec 2016
Hushhhh, let me let you in
on a secret: when Mummy tucks us in
for the night, we're not in for the night
- gap between ledge & limb, we leap it,
springheeled imps!
Moonlite's orphans in batcaped dressinggowns,
we skive the sheets. Lil' devils shimmy down
to a midnite playground.

Shushhhh, tonite we hunt
Lady Barbie from Dolltown Abbey.
She'll never get a crick in it, but I won't gob out
my plastic fangs at her plastic gregory.
'S dangerous game getting mislaid during play,
Lord Ken's action men haven't got the bits for a stakeout.

Mummy & Daddy don't believe in us,
but we don't want Daddy & Mummy's blood.

Whoooosh, from foldedup towers
of 'Twilight' duvet covers,
Castle Ovalstein we glide! Bat ballet,
but not to do battle with
wiener werecubs, rugface rats.
No, our supernatural dustup
is with the real Lords of the Night:
yellow peril, Bananas in Pyjamas.

Don't touchhhh me, Van Helsing,
you lay a garlicky glove on me
& I'll dob you in to Social Services'
nightline. Just because I'm a vampire
doesn't mean I'm not a ******.
Boris & Igor are my teddybears,
disinterring the toybox,
Paddington Burke & Winnie-the-Hare, yeah!

Mummy & Daddy don't believe in us,
but we don't want Daddy & Mummy's blood.

I am a jimjampyre, jimjampyre,
vanna drink your cherryade!
Am a jimjampyre, vanilla vampire!
I vont to drink strawberry shake!
Lysander 'Lice' Hardy-Pearce
Written by
Lysander 'Lice' Hardy-Pearce  41/M/East Anglia, England
(41/M/East Anglia, England)   
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